Tuesday, June 19, 2018

yay happy

So I'm feeling pretty good about life right now. Yesterday I got off work a little before 10pm which is nice because then I feel like I have some time to run around and do stuff before I go to bed. My job is good. Just serving at a restaurant but making decent tips and actually doing stable financially. So that's amazing.

So something I really like is finding furniture that people put on the sidewalk. Is that gross? I always clean it inside and out before using it! I even got a side table once that I sanded all over and repainted turquoise and it's so perfect because my amp for my guitar fits into it perfectly. I'm pretty lazy about practicing but one day I swear I'm gonna be a rockstar. When I'm ready.

So anyways, last night, I'm about to be home, I'm driving up the alley on the way to my parking spot, and there's a nice dresser thing left outside! It was super heavy and pretty big, I had to fold down the back seats of my car to get it to fit, but I was able to get it in there and now it's in my house! It's pretty deep and has like four shelves in it so it fits a lot of stuff! It's perfect for storing my arts and crafts supplies with plenty of space. I already had a set of drawers in the living room with arts and crafts supplies but now I can space things out and when I open a drawer or look at a shelf I can clearly see all my supplies without having to dig around. I had so much stuff I had forgotten about! There have been times when. I go to the craft store to buy supplies and then I come home and realize I already have exactly what I just bought. Super annoying and wasteful really. But now I'm more organized than ever and even got rid of some stuff that was just taking up space.

I've been living in my apartment for like 8 years but I still occassionally reorganize things and re-decorate here and there. It's really fun. I love that I get to have my own space where I have basically made the living room into an art studio. I'm just really happy and comfortable in my home. Growing up I had to go back and forth between my parent's housess and it was HORRIBLE. I HATED IT. So having a home that really feels like a home is a big deal for me. It's my sanctuary <3

I am just sitting in my living room looking at how organized and clean everything is and I'm just very grateful and happy. I'm at a really good place in my life and I want to capture that.

Yesterday while I was cleaning I found a list of daily goals I had made when I was 10 years old. I could see that my mom had added "pray at least once a day" to the bottom of the list haha. I think it's interesting she not only added to my list, but that she said to pray "at least" once a day like you're supposed to pray multiple times a day. I don't think that's a rule with Catholics. Also, I used to go to Catholic school and when I was like 8 years old I straight up told my mom I didn't want to go anymore and she was like ok. And since then religion has never been my favorite, especially the Jesus-y ones. But still, the sentiment is something I appreciate. "Pray at least once a day." Hm. That's actually a warm and fuzzy kind of thing. I don't pray everyday but I feel like that can translate to being grateful. I try to take some time everyday to stop and think about all the things in my life that I should be thankful for and how I can try to share that happiness with others by being a good person and helping others when I can. And that's basically praying I guess.

I don't know... I'm just happy. I'm doing ok money wise, better than before for sure. My boyfriend and I are doing well, I'm making an effort to be more present for my friends and family, I'm healthy and working out here and there, and I don't know. Life is good. I always try to just express myself when I'm happy and not just be in the habit of always complaining which is an easy pattern to fall into.

So if bad things happen I can think back to this moment right now and be happy because I know this is attainable and I will have this happiness again.